The Value of Having Values

03/02/2007

“What is the use of a house if you haven't got a tolerable planet to put it on?” Henry David Thoreau

Values are so important because they fundamentally shape our relationships, our behaviors, our choices, and who we are. So, without knowing what our values are, it is actually impossible to create the lives we want because there is no foundation to build them on. Many of us cannot understand why we do not reach certain goals as we are determined, diligent, have a lot of willpower and really do want to reach our dream. On the other hand sometimes we do reach our goals yet still feel empty and unfilled. Why is that? I believe it is because we have made goals based on outer appearances, what others want for us or what we think we want or should want for ourselves. The goals in essence do not match with what our heart wants.

So much emphasis is placed on making goals and reaching them, but not too much is said about values. I suggest that if values are not determined and in place, making goals and achieving them will prove worthless. Goals that are achieved without a core foundation leave us feeling empty every time because the goals and achievements are not in alignment with whom we really are.

It stands to reason then that we determine our values first to help us clarify and confirm what it is that is truly important in life for us. The question of values is often overlooked, too, because it seems such a huge and impossible question to answer. The word “values” is so easily and loosely used, but when I ask friends and others “So what are your values?” they come up tongue-tied almost every time. In fact they do not fully understand what a value is. Values and goals often get mixed up too. It is true! It is a difficult task, but with guidance and direction this can be exciting, extremely enlightening and liberating. Where does one start? We can start right at the beginning by asking thought-provoking questions. Questions of Value may include such questions as:
What do my values need to be for me to be the person I want to be? What do my values need to be for me to have an impact on all those I meet? What values need to change that will support me in achieving my greatness?

These are but a few, but if we start asking ourselves the "right" questions, we are very likely to come up with the "right" answers.